One friend told me I think I make a good writer and I should write a book because of the experiences i've gotten to have so far. I gave that a shot. The bried attempt is still there, along with a massive pile of other unpublished writings, musings, less than attractive thoughts that i didn't feel were worth publishing. I've written quite a bit at this point now that i think of it. Between all of the journals in all their different forms, damn.
I keep feeling compelled to share though, and for some reason it feels good, so continue writing I shall.
I got my front driver's window busted about a week ago or so. I had just finished spending some time with a friend and was making my way, somewhere, not really sure exactly where I was going when I saw skyzone, that trampoline park show up on google maps. Nice one google, your advertising finally worked. I called em up and found out that going in the morning would prove to be a far better decision than going then at that moment, which it was around 9pm. So I took a right on the next street and parked my car on the side of the road. I then crawled in back and went to sleep. I'm leaving out details about me masturbating. I guess i'm including that I'm leaving them out so model that it is ok to talk about sex.
Anywho, I wake up to the sound of glass shattering. I sit up and see a car pulled alongside of mine and a guy leaning out of the passenger side of the other car swinging something repeatedly into my driver side front window. It's fun to look back at this and ask the question as a hypothetical, "you wake up to the sound of someone trying to smash in your car window while you're inside. what do you do?..." Well, i found out what i do! I try to open the the 2nd row door on the driver side, realize the door is locked, unlock it, and then open it up and holler, "hey get outta here!" The window shattering stopped and they peeled off as i pulled down the windshield covers to attempt to read their license plate. alas, no dice.
The most interesting point to note here is that while they successfully shattered my window, they did not gain access. My anti-theft security tint finally paid off! In my mind I counted 3-4 thwacks after the initial shattering of the glass and the window still didn't give in. So that was cool!
They are now gone and I am now alone. I gather my thoughts, notice my bodily response of trembling. Ah, that's the adrenaline. Notice my euphoric state, adrenaline feels pretty good...Enjoy that high for a bit, then feel the headache as the adrenaline wears off. Good job body. I realize they might come back around for a second go, they don't. I call my friend who's house i just left and tell him what happened. He says I can come back and crash at his place. I am extremely grateful. I get the window replaced and retinted for a grand total of $210. Not terribly expensive for a novel experience and getting to witness my instinctual response i'd say!
Since then i've noticed i'm a bit more on edge when i hear a sound as i'm falling asleep. I imagine that will fade with time. I'm also a bit more thoughtful about what else is on the street that i'm parking on. It's a tricky situation. On one hand, i drive a boring looking mom vehicle. On the other, the paint is peeling on the hood and the windows have limo tint, which ups the sketch factor. It's keeps curious eyes from seeing in, and it also makes my mom car seem a little bit more sketchy than i want. It's good to acknowledge what is. There are pros and cons to almost every decision and I just have to live with that.
I've been thinking about that a lot lately. Like how i'm 30 years old and jobless and sleep in my 'burb. When I compare myself to others who have more money than me, or some sort of prestigious career, I feel a bit inadequate. That's when the pros kick in though. Sure I'm in an unorthodox place financially and career wise, but I don't know that I would have made any different decisions in my past. I've dont my best so far and given it my all. So what if things haven't worked out. I know I've chosen the riskier path a whole bunch of times and now i'm sleeping in the bed i've made. And i have that. I have my knowing that i did everything exactly how i wanted to and i didn't settle. And for me, that is waaay more valuable than some career that i just feel ok about, or a swollen bank account achieved from some job that sucks my soul dry.
So here's to honoring the cards you were dealt, the cards currently in your hand, and the table you sit at, and the seat you sit in, and the whole fucking journey that brought you to this point.
And no, I didn't end up going to skyzone. We'll have to save that for another day.
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